Here is how my birthday unfolded:

5:30 am - phone rings. one of my husband's employees, calling in sick. this put husband in an extremely bad mood as it is a particular habit of this employee to be sick on Monday mornings.

7:00 - took a very clingy Anyka to school. Broke my heart to leave with her crying "but today should be a snuggle mama day!" as I walked down the hall.

7:45 - Our team of 5 employees is down to three today, due to one resignation and a vacation. The typical "someone is out" crises ensue.

9:30 - Call from school. Anyka's face, which my mom had discoverd was swollen, is causing her pain and she is complaining. I tell my boss I am taking an early lunch to run her to the dentist but I will be back in an hour. Our normal dentist is not at the office 5 minutes from work, but across town (20 minutes). I sigh and tell my boss it might be more like an hour and a half.

10:30 - our normal dentist takes one peek in Anyka's mouth, goes pale, and makes 8 phone calls until she finds a pedi dentist who can take her in immedaitely. This dentist is 30 minutes away from her office (45-50 from home). Anyka is given a necklace and a pencil with a dental mirror on the end.

11:30 Arrive at emergency dentist only to be told he is not a provider for our insurance. Agree to a $44 emergency exam to at least determine the problem and options for solutions. The ultra-fabulous nurse takes an x-ray and gives Anyka a sticker.

11:55 Ultra-fabulous dentist informs me that Anyka has an absess in two of her molars that is ragingly infected. Both must be extracted immediately if not sooner. Ultra-fabulous office staff has already arranged with Roy's insurance to cover 80% of any charges, meaning my bill will be less than $150 out the door. Impressed, I agree to the procedure. I am told I can be with her the whole time. The ultra-fabulous nurse gives Anyka two stickers.

12:05 Oral sedative is prepared and given to Anyka, who promptly pukes it back all over me. She is cleaned up and given three stickers.

12:25 Nasal membrane sedative applied. She is given two stickers and a bracelet for bravery.

12:45 Sedative is fully in effect, sats are good and nitrous oxide is making her deliciously still. The dentist checks her out and says he will begin in 20 minutes.

1:00 The dentist pulls two teeth, cleans out the sockets and remaining infected tissue, and stitches up the hole. 1:05 Anyka is given pure oxygen and awakes puzzled by the cotton in her mouth. 1:20 after passing the walking test, Anyka is given four stickers and a sugar-free lollipop for being so good. She has a hissy fit when told she cannot yet eat her sugar-free lollipop, until she is mollified by the fact that she can have all the ice cream she wants.

1:25 She has plastered her twelve-dozen stickers all over her arms and legs in the car and fallen fast asleep. 2:15 I drop Anyka off at Roy's. While carrying her up the stairs, totally zorked, I get the benefit of literal mouthfuls of bloody drool on my shoulder. The whole process is comical, carrying my bestickered preschooler, her very full backpack, a Hello Kitty the size of a Buick, twelve dozen gauze pads and the ultra-fabulous dentist's CELL PHONE NUMBER! (Have I mentioned he is fabulous?)

2:30 I arrive back at work, still covered in vomit and blood. I check for emergencies. There are several, and even my foul state cannot keep my co-workers from getting their answers. I manage for about an hour and then beg off for the rest of the day.

4:35 I arrive at the gym in no mood to work out but suffer through cardio and a session with my trainer. By now I am totally fried, but my husband is on his way home determined to take me to dinner so there is hope! PF Chang's here I come!